John R. Brandt's Blog

"People run down...

... and they confuse their condition with the world's."

—John Updike

 

If restaurants were run like banks...

...they'd only serve food when you weren't hungry.

Not to mention all the fees they'd charge for the privilege of doing business with them: Reservation or Seating Fees, maybe, or a Clean Tableware Surcharge.

They'd never go out of business, either, because if the price of tomatoes went up, they's just apply for a TARP (Tomato Automatic Reinvestment Program) bailout.

But you'd still be starving.

"The best birth control ever invented."

(the phrase used by a friend this morning to describe the experience of watching somebody else's kids —including a teenager — for a week).

Ethical guidance that always works, regardless of the situation

From the very funny overheardinthenewsroom.com:

Reporter 1: “I have an ethical dilemma.”

Reporter 2: “Whichever choice is the least fun is the right one.”

Why Manufacturing is Exactly Like a Hike in the Cloud Forest

I recently visited Costa Rica. We hiked in the cloud forest (the view from the continental divide…amazing), zip-lined over the rain forest, and chilled afterward with an Imperial beer or two (the only bit of high school Spanish I could recall, it seems, was “Dos cervezas, por favor.”). It was a life-changing trip, and I feel privileged to have seen one of the most ecologically diverse (and fragile) regions in the world.

Yet in getting ready for my vacation, I was struck by how unprepared I was for a new adventure. And that got me to thinking about Next Generation Manufacturers. I was unprepared because for the past 10 years I’ve primarily traveled for speeches or business—and in true Boy Scout/Lean fashion, I always have my business travel “tools” ready to go:

• A garment bag preloaded with a toiletries kit (including duplicates of everything I use at home) and workout clothing (again, duplicates)
• A briefcase preloaded with every charger, connector, and cable I could conceivably need
• Preselected “meeting ensembles,” including sport coat, shirt, and pants, that all work with the same black belt and black loafers (to ease passage through the TSA maze at the airport)

This system lets me pack and get out the door in minutes for a business trip—but was next to useless for an expedition that required hiking boots, insect repellant, headlamps, a multi tool knife, GPS, etc.

In short, the trip that I was prepared to take wasn’t the journey that I actually found myself on. Which meant that I had a steep learning curve and a not-inconsiderable amount of pre-adventure stress, even though I really did want to reach that vista over the cloud and rain forests.

It’s similar (though with less beer) for would-be Next Generation Manufacturers. These execs have spent so much time just surviving over the past few years—cutting costs, rationalizing product lines, shoring up capital structures—that in some ways they’ve arrived at an economic recovery with the wrong tools in their bags. Success over the next few years will require dramatically different thinking about:

• What customers really want
• What it really means to be a global or green manufacturer
• What talent it takes to really seize the opportunity to grow

Most companies don’t yet have those answers. And for those that do, few have them arranged neatly in a bag that they can carry confidently to the future.

The good news is that the research says that NextGen tools, techniques, and tactics are out there—and that, used properly, they’ll get you to where you want to go.

But it’s going to take a little repacking.

Sign on a hand dryer in the restroom of Poag Mahone's

"Put Your Hands Underneath to Hear What Your Politicians Are Saying."

Thanks, Incredibly Sloppy Online Marketing Firm Named Epsilon...

...for allowing my email address to be stolen by hackers. Why just yesterday I was asking myself: What can I do to get more spam? Little did I know that you, Chase, Best Buy, Disney and a host of others were already working on my lack-of-spam-and-phishing problem. Thanks, too, for your awesome forthrightness about the security breach, evidenced by this quote from your spokesflack in The New York Times: “We are currently working with authorities and are conducting a full investigation. We are limited in what we can share.”

Um... what? It was my information that was stolen, right?

Fortunately, I've already done my own full investigation, and don't have to wait to share its one-word conclusion: 

Unsubscribe.

Email footer that made me laugh out loud

Notice: It's OK to print this email. Paper is a biodegradable, renewable, sustainable product made from trees. Growing and harvesting trees provides jobs for millions of Americans. Working forests are good for the environment and provide clean air and water, wildlife habitat and carbon storage. Thanks to improved forest management, we have more trees in America than we had 100 years ago. (originally from, it turns out, The Wall Street Journal).

Never take a decision until you have to.

—Margaret Thatcher

Attention TSA Personnel

It has come to my attention that some of you still labor under a number of misconceptions. Let's set the record straight on two quick items:

1. There is no "National TSA Policy" on whether to put your shoes in a bin or on the conveyor belt. I know you think, based on your experience at your airport, that the way you do it — In the bin! On the belt! — is the only way to safeguard the nation's airspace. THIS IS NOT TRUE. That means that when you act offended or disgusted by the shoe-bin-or-belt ignorance displayed by those of us who travel to multiple airports (and who have binned or belted according to local custom), you seem like a rube.
2. The same goes for whether an iPad or phone or keys can be in the same bin as a laptop. Multiple airports, multiple standards. Think of it this way: If the X-ray person can clearly see both, you're just saving time and space. Save the outrage for the 85lb. Hello Kitty carry-ons.

Thank you, and have a pleasant day.